My last blog post was on Betty Dodson, “mother of masturbation.” I just finished reading her seminal book, Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving, and my general reaction was along the lines of “Where have you been all my life?!”

Courtesy of Barnes and Noble

This is the book that told the world that masturbation is ok, that it’s time to get comfy with our selfloving, stop feeling guilty, and enjoy the sensations already. It caused quite the stir in 1974 when it was first published as an essay in the celebrated, butt-kicking feminist magazine, Ms., then once again in 1986 when it was published as an extended book, Sex for One.

The book focuses mostly on the quandaries us ladies have with ourselves “down there,” like genital self-image, the inability to orgasm, or the eternal confusion over where or what the clitoris and G-spot actually are. But the book doesn’t discriminate; it speaks to many unisex concerns, such as the guilt that comes from being conditioned that masturbation is unhealthy, and it dispels the notion that masturbation is selfish or an unfulfilling alternative to partner sex.

“Masturbation is a primary form of sexual expression,” Dodson states in the first line, asserting that selflove is just as legit, fun, and healing as partner sex.

Dodson explains how some hot selfloving can actually boost confidence, open your mind, tap into your creative consciousness, relieve stress, and generally make you enjoy the heck out of life. All this comforting and encouraging information is written in a totally non-threatening, non-crazy-wingnut way, and it’s all packaged with some lovely, honest illustrations of people engaged in their preferred form of selfloving.

Sound too good to be true? Read the book.

– Ms. Feelgood

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